Helping our patients to apply the right amount of fusion, detachment, or mindfulness to thoughts for better mental health

In Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), one of the core things we learn is that if we can change our thoughts, we can change our behaviours and feelings.

So we may embark on helping people changing their “negative thoughts” into more “positive ones”.

This of course, often doesn’t work sustainably. It is not always that simple. There’s nuance to that.

The problem is not necessarily in the thoughts itself, but the wrong level of fusion or detachment from those thoughts.

For example….

The thoughts around “I am not good enough”.

If one is overly fused, “zoomed into” or “hooked into” the thoughts or feelings of “not good enough”, then this may lead to experiences of shame.

If one is defused, centered, and mindful enough about the thoughts or feelings of “not good enough”, then this may lead to experiences of humility.

If one is too detached from the thoughts and feelings of “not good enough”, then this may lead to experiences of over confidence.

So the focus of counseling is not just about the quality of thoughts, but also on our ability to apply the right amount of fusion, detachment, or mindfulness to those thoughts.

That’s the hardest part.