Helping our patients to hold thoughts and feelings more lightly in order to resolve conflict

When a diverse group of people WITH the ability to hold thoughts and feelings “relatively lightly”, come together to discuss and debate on a topic, we may have better shared understanding. We may gain more clarity and make better decisions.

When a diverse group of people WITHOUT the ability to hold thoughts and feelings “relatively lightly”, come together to discuss and debate on a topic, we may have intense conflict with fight or flight responses. We may gain more confusion and make worse decisions.

We may notice this in couples, families, the work place, and any other groups we see.

The key missing skill is often the ability to hold thoughts and feelings “relatively lightly”, and with genuine care and curiosity during a discussion. Without it, it simply becomes an argument.