Counseling at the “primary color” level

When counseling, I try to see people’s emotional world and personalities at the “primary color” level, rather than at the “secondary or tertiary color” level.  At the “primary color” level, metaphorically speaking, it’s simpler, and it can help us to navigate more complex and confusing emotional problems. 

Some individuals we see, have a very fused, hooked, or attached relationship with their thoughts and beliefs, leading to strong feelings and emotions. Let’s call this group “feeling users”. They tend to use feelings to both perceive and guide their actions. They are biased towards making decisions based on their feelings, or the feelings of others. These folks have the superpower of empathy, passion, sensitivity, and connectedness, but at the price of possible drama, impulsivity, and at times, irrationality. Their life lesson is to follow their “heart”, and at the same time, take their “head” with them. 

On the other hand, we also see individuals who are much less fused, hooked, or attached to their thoughts and beliefs, leading to less feelings and emotions. They are somewhat “detached” in an emotional sense.  Let’s call them “less feeling users”. Their superpower is of course, being logical and rational, but at the price of being “insensitive” at times, although, often unintended. Their life lesson is to follow their “head”, and at the same time, take their “heart” with them. 

And of course, we also see individuals who are in the diverse “middle range”. 

As a Family Doctor, we need to be “bilingual”, and speak both languages, so that we can assist our patients to also be “bilingual”, and be more adaptable in this complex, social world. 

Our Universities seem to have forgotten this. 

Would you agree?