Helping our patients dig deeper into the core problem

I once had a patient who asked me why she has such a hard time asking for help or favors. 

So I asked her whether it’s driven by fear or the passion to “not ask”.

Fear it was. 

So fear of what?

When we dug deeper, this is where it led us.

Fear of people saying no and no means rejection.
Deeper and it’s the fear of rejection.
Deeper and it’s the fear of the awful feeling of rejection.
Deeper and it’s the fear of the feeling of “not good enough”.
Deeper and it’s shame, disconnectedness, and I am not likable, acceptable or lovable.

Many of our patients’ fears tend to converge back to this same “source”. Shame. Not good enough. I am not likable or lovable. 

So resolving the “source problem”, will alleviate a lot of fear and anxiety in many of our patients.

As Family Doctors, I am sure that you have seen that.